Monday. Monday after the Electric Party Boat. So, here's a video, a YouTube Classic to make you laugh:

DEPUTIES IN TROUBLE

Two Washing County, Tennessee deputies have been supsended with pay pending an internal investigation. They were cited by a U.S. Forest Service officer last week. They've been charged with posessing alcohol in a prohibited area, public nudity, and public intoxication. They've been suspended, HOWEVER, we were wondering, have you ever been caught naked?

DUMB CRIMINAL OF THE DAY

Here it is . . . your Idiot Criminal Of The Day! Today's lucky winner is 23-year-old Crystal Whitaker of Lake Park, Florida.

On Friday, Crystal took her 10-month-old daughter to a JCPenney. They went into a dressing room and Crystal jammed $256 worth of clothes into a bag. Then, she sprinted out of the store.

Employees tried to catch her, but she got away.

Crystal had made one big mistake, though . . . she FORGOT to take her BABY with her.

The employees found the 10-month-old, alone . . . right next to Crystal's purse, which she'd also left behind. The purse had her ID, including her address.

The Florida Department of Children and Families came to the store to get the baby.

The police tracked down Crystal . . . and she's been charged with child abuse without great harm, child neglect without causing great harm, contributing to the delinquency of a dependent, and theft.

SUPERMAN IS REAL!?

Who says SUPERMAN doesn't exist? He LITERALLY just saved a family from absolute disaster.

The family, who asked the press to keep their name and their location confidential, was facing FORECLOSURE . . . they couldn't afford the payments their home and the bank was getting ready to bounce them out.

As they packed up their belongings to leave the house, they found an old box in their basement containing about nine comic books.

One of those comic books was "Action Comics No. 1" . . . a.k.a. the comic book that featured the first appearance of Superman . . . a.k.a. the most valuable comic book OF ALL TIME.

They looked it up online and found that copies of that book have sold for up to $1.5 MILLION at auction. So they contacted a comic book auction expert named Vincent Zurzolo who runs the website ComicConnect.com.

He examined the comic and gave it a rating of "very good" based on its condition. Since it's not perfectly mint, it should only make about $250,000 at auction . . . not quite $1.5 million, but still enough for the family to easily save their house.

And while that's amazing for them . . . unfortunately, most Americans DON'T have the most valuable comic book in the world in their basements. In the first six months of this year, more than 1.6 million homes were in foreclosure.

YOUNG KID TRYING TO GET HOT GIRL

Check out this boy trying to get this hot girl to flash him!

MONDAY MORNING MAILBAG

Her boss has been cooking for two years! BUT, her food is terriable! She can't eat another bite, how does she ask her to stop cooking? Truth? LIE?! HELP!

SHARK WEEK

Yesterday, Discovery Channel kicked off one of the best weeks of the year . . . SHARK WEEK. Here are five myths about sharks we want to BUST.

#1.) SHARKS WILL ALWAYS ATTACK HUMANS. Just because you see a shark, there's no guarantee it's going to go all "Jaws" on you. If sharks have access to their usual prey, like seals, they'll usually leave humans alone.

#2.) SHARKS ARE IDIOTS. Sharks are some of the smartest predators in the animal kingdom. They have about a 50% success rate at killing their prey . . . that's higher than lions and most of the other famous predators.

#3.) SHARKS FOLLOW THEIR NOSES. Sharks do use their sense of smell, but many species also have really good eyesight and hearing. And they also have an extra sense that detects the electrical fields that all living things give off. (!!!)

#4.) SHARKS WILL EAT ANYTHING. Most sharks like to stick to their favorite foods and not get too creative. For great whites, that's seals during the winter, and fish, rays, and other smaller sharks in the spring.

#5.) SHARKS CAN'T GET CANCER. This myth comes from the people who sell "shark cartilage" pills, saying that they might cure cancer because sharks are cancer-free. It's not true. Cancer in sharks is VERY rare, but possible.

THE SKINNY ON CHOCOLATE AND DOGS

A lot of people say you're not supposed to feed a dog chocolate because it's poisonous. That's because it has a chemical called theobromine (--pronounced thee-oh-BRO-meen). And it IS lethal in certain amounts.

But luckily, most candy bars are made with MILK chocolate, which isn't very toxic. So if your dog eats some M&M's, don't rush to the vet. A dog can eat about one ounce of milk chocolate for every pound of body weight.

So, a seven-pound dog could eat FOUR Hersey bars and PROBABLY wouldn't die. Just be warned: BAKING chocolate is VERY toxic. And ANY kind of chocolate will cause digestive issues.

Other foods that dogs can't have include: onions, grapes, macadamia nuts, and avocados. But if you just HAVE to feed your dog people food, here's a list of foods that are actually GOOD for your dog . . . (JK)

#1.) MEAT AND CHEESE. If you run out of dog food, you can give your dog any kind of meat, as long as it's cooked and it doesn't have any bones. Even scrambled eggs will keep a dog going, if you're in a pinch.

Cheese is okay for MOST dogs. But just like people, they can be lactose intolerant.

#2.) PEANUT BUTTER. For the most part, dogs don't have peanut allergies like people do. And all dogs love peanut butter. So it's good if they're underweight and won't eat anything else.

#3.) BERRIES. The antioxidants in blueberries, blackberries, strawberries, and raspberries are good for people AND dogs.

Frozen berries are cheaper, but they're just as good. And some dogs actually PREFER frozen berries because they like chewing on the ice.

#4.) SUNFLOWER SEEDS. It's kind of a strange thing to give a dog, but it's on the list. So if you've got a 10-pound bag of sunflower seeds you've been trying to get rid of . . . by all means, give it to your dogs.

The only catch is, they can't have the shell. They can only have the nut.

#5.) BABY CARROTS. They're good for your dog's teeth. Plus, they make good treats because they're low in calories. So your dogs can eat as many as they want.

From What U Need 2 Know:

Yesterday, the Presient of Iran, Ahmadinejad, picked a fight with Paul the Octopus. Seriously. During the World Cup, Paul the Psychic Octopus accurately predicted the winners of all seven games Germany played in, plus the final. Ahmadinejad called Paul, "an example of methods of propaganda and superstitions of the West." It's on! This all old news to Paul, he's too busy alreay laughing at the new panel of judges on American Idol.

Don't Roll Yer Eyes at ME!

All I really have left is my ability to roll my eyes when getting chafed by whatever powers at be I have ticked off lately. Yes, I can be a major tool. Well, the "MAN" wants to steal our right to roll our eyes from us. The town of Elmhurst, Illinois wants to make it illegal to sarcastically roll your eyes! (cue: roll your eyes!!) If you're caught doing you'll get a ticket and a fine.

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Have you seen Drew Carey lately?? Well, you heard about Bob Barker giving Drew down the road for his performance on "The Price is Right". Personally, I could care less about all that drama. Don't watch it anyway. But, look at Drew Carey! He's lost nearly 80 lbs and he now kinda looks like Bob Barker!! It's reported that he did it by eating right and exercising.